St.Mark's Poetry Project Silent Auction

Today I volunteered at the Poetry Projects Silent Auction. I am now the proud owner of many cool items. But the one I love the best is a broadside of a Ted Berrigan poem writ in 1970:



Scorpion, Eagle & Dove (A Love Poem)



November, dancing, or

Going to the store in the country,

Where green changes itself into LIFE,

MOVING ON, Jockey Shorts, Katzenmiaou,

A Chesterfield King & the blue book,

In OLD SOUTHAMPTON

you make my days special

You do Jimmy's & Alice's,

Phoebes, Linda's

Lewis' & Joannes too...

& Kathy's (a friend who is new)

& Gram's...

who loved you,

like I do,

once...

& who surely does so since

that 4th of July last,

A Saturday,

a day that left her free

To be with & love you

(& me)

(all of us)

just purely;

clean;

& sleflessly...

*

no thoughts

*

Just, it's true. As i would be

& as I am, to you,

this

November.



Ted Berrigan, 1970

Celiac and Me

Today, I woke feeling my Celiac Disease at its worst. Which means I feel like shit. Which means I can’t move too good, and my head hurts and is fuzzy and everything hurts, including Liver, Kidneys, and the artery in my left leg. Swelling hands. Joint pain. Nausea and migrainey… and there are pills for all these symptoms, but I still have to eat. lunch. I’m sick of yogurt and shrimp. I ate beef soup with ditalini last night – at Bridget’s..she made her mom’s soup. But I can’t eat gluten. And I hadn’t told her I’m back off the wheat and our dinner was already planned. A bowl of soup. So I ate it. And it was good. And today I woke sick. Really sick. Celiac sick, which is something I KNOW, like I know my name.

Celiac-sick feels like somebody punched you in the stomach. While you are severely hungover. Nothing makes it better really, but time. Time without gluten. Gluten is the protein found in wheat. Which is part of the wheat grain, and in pretty much everything. I was born with Celiac Disease. As soon as I ate cereal as a baby, a wee bairn., which in those days was as an infant. I had failure to thrive, and pneumonia’s (multiple) and a bi-afran-ish-baby belly, with skinny arms and legs. And all I did was cry. The classic celiac-baby. And five years ago I went gluten free, and it was better. So much better. (though I still cry.) And now I’ve been on a gluten-trial, through the doctor's at the Columbia Presbyterian Celiac Center, which means I put gluten back into my diet to prove it exists, which is a torture and ridicilous. and I am really sick from it. So no more. Back to gluten-free-me. But it takes time and planning and people have to know how to feed you and it’s not so easy for some but for me it was fine. Gluten hurt my belly my whole life, and made me feel hypo-glycemic, lightheaded and weird. And I was always skinny and now I'm fat. so back at it.

So no wheat, means a gluten-free diet. Which is really great, and really ok, as long as you embrace the fact that you are essentially cured by this diet. For once and for all. So no beer, no real pizza, no italian bread, no pancakes is a drag, but really…If I could only cure all my pain so easy.

Today at lunch I had Amy’s rice crust pizza which is the best frozen pizza out there. Gluten or no gluten. You can “doctor” it up, as Marylou says, which is what I did. And it’s great.

Amy’s Rice Crust Pizza Dr’d.Up.

Add some fresh mozzarella slices (whole foods) to your liking. Some portabello mushroom slices and a drizzle of olive oil,with a pinch of hot pepper seeds and cook it,at 425degrees for about 23 minutes, until it's crispy and melted. And add some good grated cheese if you want. or Garlic powder. (I bought the new personal pan pizza, which isn’t worth it financially. But was perfectly delicious anyway.)

I feel like I’m hallucinating. Is it the celiac? Or the pills? “I keep seeing a person in my peripheray…am I stoned, or is it a ghost? Or maybe it’s you?”

OK, going to lay down and watch another movie..Oh, I just watched “Juno” a very cute movie that mentiones Patti Simth. But Adoption? I don't get it. hmm. But that’s a dinner conversation.

Buenos Dias.

Let them eat Shrimp

Isn't life just like a recipe that you're making on the fly?

Like todays Shrimp salad:

6 large cooked shrimp chopped into midsize pieces, tails removed
One handful of spinach, washed chopped upA small amount of raisins -- like a 1/4 cup
An even smaller amount of chopped walnutssome chopped up sweet ripe tomatoe
2tbls Mayo
lots of Salt & Pepper
Mix it all together and serve open face on some good grainy toast (gluten free for me)

Every morsel, bite of this has something tasty in it. It's pretty to look at, it's very nice for company, but it's easy to make and eat alone. Which is what I'm doing. Except for the mayo, it's very lo-cal. It's gluten-free.

If I was going to have a dessert with it, I'd serve some my special yogurt/whipped cream dessert:

One cup Stoneyfield Caramel lowfat yogurt
1 dollup cup Stonefield Whole Milk French Vanilla yogurt
2 Tbls (squirts) Organic Whipped cream in a can
Blackberries

First put the Caramel yogurt in a nice bowl or wine class. Dollup the vanilla yogurt in the middle. Squirt the whipped cream in the center, and sprinkle the blackberries around the whipped cream.

Magnificent.

Lo-cal. Today I was watching the great documentary on the NYDolls...chronicling the demise and comeback of the band. So great where they've been and where they've come back to. But as I was dancing at the end, rocknrolling I got a glimpse of my old self...you cannot be fat and be a rockchick.

Amen.

When Taken Ill

When it comes to food, what can you eat when you've been up all night with a migraine, then horrific acid reflux? Acid reflux is no laughing matter. Neither is a migraine or head pain. The only good answer to this is to sleep sitting up.

Things to eat during an attack:
Acid Reflux & Migraine

Dried Papaya
Soft chew rolaids
Green water (chlorophyl)
stay away from the pizza
cupcakes and party food.
even the morning concoction
of Aloe Vera Gel, Mango puree and
Flax see oil could kill you.
over time.
Coffee rots the gut but
can you really live without not
one little cup?
Rice toast is good. Rice. In general
soothes.
Don't eat too much fatfilled yogurt
I love Stoneyfield French Vanilla with
the layer of cream on top.
The cream hurts.
Is this all a punishment?
Has god abandoned me or is it payment of some
sort; for my sins.
like wiping out a whole family?
How can I atone?
I'm hungry.

-lw

Let them Eat Cake

It's morning and birthday week here at my house. Todd's birthday (the ex), and my sister. Both born a day apart, same year. So different yet the same in their actions and characteristics. Amazing. It was also my niece Molly Sweeney's First Holy Communion on Sunday.

It's all about food, these occassions. All occasions. (I don't know how to spell, and the more I write this blog the more you'll notice it. I have a good idea of how things are supposed to sound, but ever since brain surgery I just can't seem to hone it in. I also make up words, which I think is highly acceptable. But I digress.)

The end of the week last week was all about Peg's funeral and the food being the final piece of the pie, so to speak. The Capawanna's are italian so the after party was of course Italian Food. I missed it, but I heard it was delicious. Had at The Appian Way in Orange, NJ. A perfect sendoff for Peg, who rests filled and satisfied with family and friends surrounding her.

Then the Communion Party -- Molly Sweeney. That was a combo-nation of italian/american food from The Brownstone Inn, in Patterson, NJ. Really good, with Fettucine Alfredo, chicken, beef tips, the requisite spiral Ham, Salad, Eggplant rolantine, and cake and dessert. A real sleep enhancing type of meal. The best part was the kitchen help my sister Melissa paid for. Gee, totaly worth it.

Then last night's dinner for Todd's birthday: Star Pizza, Orange NJ.

If anyone lives anywhere near Star, they've eaten the thin crust pizza. A tiny pie, you can probably consume a whole one yourself, and many have. I've been going to Star since I'm a wee girl, remember being there when my brothers were little and they used to mess up the tournaments at the skiball machine. (I saw grown men want to kill them; red faced and ranting to my father. There were money on those games.) It's not a fancy place but you could die for the pizza and all the other food that mingles with it, eaten on paper plates. Hot Roast beef sandwhich on italian roll; sausage and peppers; Fried Calamari; the Mista salad. It's all delicious. French Fries. Nothing is good for you, but it's incredible. Wash it down with a pitcher of Rootbeer or coronna and you've got yourself one great dinner. Most nights the wait is worth waiting for -- with babies in high chairs and big groups filling the dining room. The cool thing is that you're going to get what you're getting when you get it. It's crowded, the appetizer concept doesn't work, and once you get a seat just let the food come and the chips fall where they fall.



OK, it's early. Not anywhere near lunch, but it's been a while and I think I should go back to bed for a while. My head hurts and the news is on behind me: Obama and Hilary are neck in neck. Gas is 4.19 in NYC today. There's a backup on 287 North with a tractor trailer overturned loaded with Methasomething, highly flamable... It's going to be 76 by noontime.

Bed is calling....I hear the birds ..lovely.
Later on a poem.